THE WAYS YOU THINK!

Changing how you think about how you work is essential to changing self-defeating behaviour. Most of us have notions about what will get us recognised and what wont. These are called superstitious behaviours because we want to believe that if we don’t do them, something catastrophic will happen. I will only be rewarded if I work harder than everyone else and my boss will fire me if I tell her what I really think are examples of superstitious thinking. These thoughts are often built around parental messages about work that may have been true for our parents but are no longer valid for us. Similarly, these behaviours may have been functional early in our careers, but they are usually not as helpful later. What we do as entry-level workers to get respect and attention is more related to leadership capability, relationship skills, and the like. It’s thus difficult to relinquish these beliefs because they have worked up til now.

Why don’t you think logically about things; when you look around at the people who get promoted and recognised, are they the people who make miracles? Women take pride in the fact that they can do more with less, meet or beat impossible deadlines, and get juice out of a turnip. They actually believe others will recognise and appreciate their efforts. What they don’t realise is that every time they make a miracle, they have set the bar higher in terms of what people expect from them. Not only that, but while they are busy jumping through hoops their male colleagues are doing things that have them more visibility and ultimately, more rewards.

Realistically, establishing work habits and not thinking you have to be superwoman or man to be effective. Manage people’s expectations: always be willing to go extra mile, but don’t be afraid to point out when something is unrealistic. Pushing back when you are taken advantage of won’t be a career busters.

If you are understaffed or have so much in hand to deal with, ask for help or negotiate reasonable deadlines. Set realistic daily or weekly goals. So many people think they have thirty four hours in everyday! Don’t reinvent the wheel! What I have come to realise is that there’s not much new under the sun. If I have to do something, it means other people must have done it before, but contribute or impact much more or even fill up the gaps.

Consciously, expand your world of possibilities by enumerating your choices at every divergence on the road! Avoid tendency to disregard unconventional choices. Must importantly, when you go out of your way for people, be sure to let them know; and don’t take a perk because you want it, or think you deserve it, you take it because it manages the impressions others have of you and those you have of yourself!